Category Archives: Rant

More Things I Hate

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DANG I’m in a mood today.

Got up late (6:25 is late for me, friend), then came downstairs to do my discussion assignment for class. I won’t go into it in detail, but check out this screen shot of what my “Preview Message” window looked like. (It’s supposed to contain the formatted text from the window behind it. As you can see, it displays a blank space.)

Well, that made me mad. Had to back out of Firefox, fire up IE (which I hate), log in again, and repost. That made me mad all over again. So I ranted to tech support.

J’ever email tech support and they respond as if you’re a 9-year-old (or a 90-year-old) playing with this new “Internet” thing? Do you ever get the condescension treatment? Not that BU tech support is that way (although I’m withholding judgment until I see their response to this morning’s message), but I’ve been treated that way before by geekslingers — as if we’re all a bunch of fluffy heads going, “Hey, what’s this button do?”

Lawd.

Ok, on to this morning’s menu:

More Things I Hate (in addition to these)

  1. I hate that the price of gasoline is…ah, nevermind. You get the point.
  2. I hate it when people are in denial.
  3. I hate receiving pats on the head from tech support droids who were in elementary school when I was haunting Usenet via Deja News 3 years *before* the “dot com” era.
  4. I hate that people suffer from migraine headaches and there’s nothing anyone can do for them.
  5. I hate that I am spending $40,000 on a degree that may get me a job for which I will take a drastic pay cut. [Ok, I know that’s a choice, but I still hate it.]
  6. I hate it when people think you’re naïve and can’t see what’s *really* going on.
  7. I hate reading line after line after line of mangled, horrible, fragmented, retarded English — by a native speaker. (Hit MySpace sometime and read the “About Me” sections. It will blow your mind.)
  8. I hate hating things.
  9. I hate going on eBay and looking at a great item that sells for 99 cents — but they charge you $16.99 to ship it. It’s called Listing Fee Avoidance, and it goes on all the time, despite eBay’s big-and-bad law against it. eBay. They’re the next Microsoft.
  10. I hate it that summer is half over and I have yet to go anywhere. (Alas, refer to #1.)

Fink (the Hater) out.

I say shut up

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Am I in a mood this morning? Um, yeah.

Mavis and I were never allowed to shout “Shut up!” when we were kids. I can hear Mother: “Don’t say ‘shut up.’ It’s not nice.”

Well, I’m not feeling very nice today, so I’ma tell somebody to shut up. To Mother, up in heaven: pay no attention to the following.

Al Sharpton – Shut up.

This guy is the adult version of the kid you remember back in school, who tattled on everyone for everything. He’s also got to be the busiest man on the planet. He must do nothing all day but listen to multiple talk shows on radio and television, and read political pundits by the thousands — just to see if anyone made a comment that might be construed as racist.

Mr. Sharpton apparently thinks his fellow African Americans lack the mental fortitude to see that Don Imus is an idiot, and they need Al to intercede for them. If I were African American, I would be completely insulted. I’d wanna backhand Sharpton and tell him to go get a real job. [Yes, we know your ancestors were owned as slaves by the ancestors of Strom Thurmond. Get. Over. It.]

After the thing last year, and then adding on the comments from yesterday, yes, Imus can’t keep his mouth shut. But that’s why God gave us fingers: to change channels on the radio.

Quoth the Sharpton:

I find the inference of his remark disturbing because it plays into stereotypes. We will determine in the next day or so whether or not his remark warrants direct action on our part.”

Direct action? Direct action? Who is this guy? Fuh cripesake, stop worrying about some loudmouth moron on a radio show and focus on some real issues. You want to consider taking direct action because Imus said something you didn’t like? You call yourself an “activist” for African American issues, and you have time for this?

And don’t even get me started on the double standard issue. (“We can say the ‘N’ word and call women ‘hos’ and other filthy names, and openly degrade and exploit black women in music and videos…but only us.”) Where’s the direct action being taken on that score? I mean, honestly. Who says “boo” when black comedians openly ridicule “white people?” I’ve seen it on television a hundred times over the years, from Richard Pryor to Damon Wayans to Chris Rock. They say things like, “White folks do this…” or mimic some uncool, uncoordinated, uninformed and generally irrelevant nerd in reference to white people in general. That’s not a stereotype?

Can you see a white comedian pulling this in the reverse — and still walk away with a career? Feh.

See? You got me started. Look what you did.

Anyway.

Al – shut up. Focus on real problems, as opposed to getting all frothed up over the blatherings of an old man who fried his brain one too many times back in the 60s. He’s not worth your time.

Fink out (of coffee…can ya tell?).

What not to wear — ever

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Those of you who know me probably figured you’d see a post like this, somewhere along the way. If you are offended by frank discussion about what women wear to the office and to school, click here. I won’t be mad.

I’ll get right to the point. There are a few conclusions I’ve drawn over the years:

  1. Too many women do not own full-length mirrors. I say this because there is no way on God’s earth they could look at themselves in a full-length mirror and still leave the house wearing what they’re wearing.
  2. Too many girls think that wearing shirts and jeans that are two sizes too small will actually make them look two sizes smaller.
  3. Too many girls think that stomach, back and butt fat being squeezed over the edges of fabrics and out every imaginable clothing opening turns guys on.
  4. Too many girls think that the more cleavage they show (even if it’s on an 11-year-old 6th grader in a 30AA push-up…trust me, I’ve seen it), the more everyone will think they’re shecksy.
  5. Too many women think that if their blouse pulls at the buttons to the point of ripping the fabric, people will think….well, I don’t know what. I got nothin’. But they wear them all the time. Even on job interviews.

Item:

Is this what I see every day? Um, yeah. Now is it just me, or is this completely unattractive? Guys, please comment. [Don’t worry — it’s the internet, fuh cripesake. You can be anonymous.] Is this sexy? Should I change my outlook?

But honest to God — what was she thinking? Did she look in the mirror that morning and say, “I like how my fat looks when it flops over my polka dot belt when I walk”?? Who likes this? I mean…am I just uninformed, and it’s actually cool?

Maybe it’s just that these girls are comfortable with who they are and what their bodies look like. I say that’s great, and I wish I could say the same with confidence. But there are ways to wear nice clothes if you’re not a size zero. Let’s face it: sometimes, it ain’t about self-expression. Sometimes, people don’t care to see everything you’re made of. Those times are at work and at school. And I don’t consider myself a prude or prim and proper…I just think women — especially younger women — don’t use their heads. I am fine with girls dressing sexy, but Mary, Joseph & Buddha…use some discretion. Don’t go to school (especially if you’re a teacher, fuh cryin’ out loud) or to the office with your bodacious ta-tas hanging out.

I read some research about this. A psychologist who did a study on teenage clothing styles said:

Some of these girls don’t want to admit that they need bigger clothes. The little skinny girls are still shopping in juniors, and the big girls don’t want to admit that their bodies aren’t little.”

That could explain the following:

Item: The Sausage Casing Look

So let’s say that the girl does cover herself up and doesn’t have muffin bake exposed. Trouble is, many girls cover up with wafer thin fabrics that are skin tight: the Two Sizes Too Small Syndrome.

I want to help these girls. What shall I do? I know. An assembly on the first day of school. Bring in Clinton and Stacy!

Another disclaimer: Much of this is done in jest (ok, some of it is done in jest). I’m no snappy dresser — not by a long shot — but I do make sure all my imperfect parts are not on display for the general public. I know that doesn’t solve the issue of my face…but I’m afraid there’s not much I can do about that, other than the Unknown Comic thing.

Fink out.

People just don’t git it

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I’ma say this one last time (well ok, it probably won’t be the last).

A teacher apparently cleaned out some shelves in his/her classroom last week, and left a stack of several copies of this book on the faculty lounge table, with a sign that said “Free.” The title intrigued me, so I took one. Free books are like Christmas to me, so I was happy to get the gift.

That is, I was happy until I noticed an unforgivable, egregious, stupid, blatant and ridiculous error.

Nikola Tesla was left out.

I was incensed. After doing an initial, unsuccessful fanning of the pages to locate his picture, I went to the index in the back of the book. Nowhere to be found. Incredible. And this is a book by Scholastic — one of the leading publishers of K-12 textbooks in the country. What the world is going on here? Edison is listed, but not Tesla? Maya Lin, but not Tesla? Tiger frigging Woods, but not Tesla? It’s madness. Madness. I’m getting mad all over again just writing about it.

So I went to the web to see what other people thought about it. To my surprise (and, admittedly, utter delight), I found a review of the book at Amazon.com, submitted by an engineer. Her comments:

[T]he author forgot to mention the inventor of the electric systems used today; the AC motor, the triphasic electrical system, the AC generator (as in Niagara Falls), wireless communications, remote control, logic circuits, fluorescent lamps and many other [inventions] without which our lives today would be totally different. What would America be without Nikola Tesla?

What, indeed?

Now, see here. I’m no conspiracy theorist. In fact, I think most conspiracy theories are crap. But consider this: Tesla wanted to provide wireless capability for everyone in America — for free. Could this explain why billionaire J. P. Morgan suddenly yanked his financial support for Tesla projects? Well of course it could, sweety. Inexplicably, Tesla had enemies, not the least of which was that little rodent Thomas Edison, whose apparent mission in life was to discredit Tesla.

Disclaimer: This is not an Edison bash-fest (although it probably looks like one). He was a brilliant man who contributed tons to the development of powered technology in this country, and in fact, the world. I just think he hated competition, and Tesla was doubly bad news because he was right. At least about this.

Back to the drama…

Edison must have known on some level that his direct current was dangerous and inferior when compared to Tesla’s AC system, but it didn’t stop him from launching a macabre, minstrel-show tour of horrors, where his assistant would use AC to electrocute dogs, live, on stage, to show how dangerous alternating current was. Tesla was, at this time, partnered with George Westinghouse, and Edison used him as a target as well.

One of Edison’s assistants got his hands on a Westinghouse AC generator, and had the bright idea to give the American public the ultimate demonstration of the horror of Tesla’s alternating current: use it on a human.

Such was the unspeakably cruel fate of William Kemmler at his execution. He was supposed to hang, but Edison’s lackey had a better idea. Here is the newspaper account from 1890, written by an eyewitness to the 9-minute “death by torture.” It will make you sick.

That’s it. I am going to do my own list.

Don’t mind me. I’m just a lil fussy this morning.

Fink out (of sorts)

Don’t care what anyone says…

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…Howard Stern is a misogynistic, ugly, lowlife bowl of pureed bile. How he got his own radio show in the first place is not worth a nanosecond of my research time, but whatever the reason, it’s lame.

And what’s more troubling is that the 18-30 male demographic thinks it’s oh-so-hip to like him. Lemmings.

Now, while any members of the aforementioned demographic who might be reading this giggle like school girls behind their fake Oakleys while they comb their mullet cuts in front of their Confederate flags which serve as window coverings, I will say that I am no prude. I don’t flush crimson at the occasional off-color joke. Nor am I a Femi-Knot See. I just find it ridiculously unfair that a white stand-up comedian who drops the “N” word in an adults-only night club gig is publicly vilified and threatened with bodily injury and lawsuits, while this Stern moron can spew his filth on open satellite airwaves with impunity and not get so much as a wrist slap.

The world is going straight to the devil.

His latest junior high prank involved singer Dolly Parton. He and his mewling, pathetic sycophants did some idiotic edit of her audio book (Remember those silly songs back in the 70s that spliced comments of famous people as “answers” to stupid fake interview questions? That’s the juvenile crap we’re talking about here. Hilarious.). In it, he depicts her as saying vicious and graphic things. She was humiliated, and went national to apologize to her fans. I hope she proceeds with a lawsuit. Not that it will stop him, mind…

It’s incredible: he always seems to find the dumbest people on earth. They gravitate towards him like a homing beacon. [Coincidence?] Case in point: a consummately stupid Connecticut teacher goes on the show and ends up having to resign at her school. Hope it was worth it, sweety. What a credit to the profession.

One good thing about him: decent rhinoplasty job. If only there was plastic surgery for the brain…

I’d give my real opinion as to why Stern takes such giddy glee in being a complete meanyhead towards women with brains, but this is a family blog.

On a lighter note….

Wanna see what happens when I catch a student writing “Wash me” on the tailgate of my truck?

HA – Sammy’s a good sport.

TGIF. Fink out.