…filled them with cement and wolverines, set them on fire, and jammed them back into my chest cavity: I shake my fist at you.

I’m fine, as long as I don’t move around too much. Stirs up the gunk, you know. It’s likely time for a visit to the medicine man, alas. Some spring break. Oh wait…what’s spring break?

Oh boo hoo already. The only real crime is having to postpone Hunger Games today because I can’t stop coughing.  And I definitely can’t visit with my grandsons like this.

*long, exasperated sigh cough COUGH HACK CHOKE*

Well, there is one bright spot…

Happy Sumday! *hack*

I think this is my life telling me to knock it off. Please put everything on hold today, whilst I croak.

Seriously — if you need me, I’ll be on the couch with a pillow, blanket, hot tea and Netflix. Also, the pile of work will be on my desk in the parlor if you’d like to come over and tackle it, there’s a good fiend.

Last night sure was nice — dinner with Stoney and a fine show by Bando’s students. And I’ve got to get through this nastiness so I can hit the cinema with Hanksy tomorrow afternoon.

But for now, I must repair to the davenport and suffer with what surely must be consumption. *cough hack sniffle wheeze choke die*

Oi.

Fink (down &) out.

I’ll tell you what’s wrong.

1. I can’t seem to get up on time, cripes. Long story, but suffice it to say that I didn’t turn on my phone alarm last night, and when I awoke at 4:08 this morning, I thought to myself, “I’ve got another hour, yay” — then opened my eyes to find it was 5:28. I gotta lay off the NyQuil.
2. There are issues I never thought would happen in a hundred years, happening. Holy cow.
3. I’m wondering if my “cold” isn’t developing into something else. There’s only been one other time in my life that I’ve had a sinus infection — and it felt just like this. Great.

But as usual, I’ll tell you a good thing or three to offset the current misery:

1. Had a brief text message chat with BoomR last night. I heart him.
2. Going to the cinema with Tom Hanks this Sunday — we’re Hunger Gaming, yay!
3. Tonight, Stoney and I are going to fellow RtB fiend Bando’s Dinner Theatre — should be a great evening.

That, and it’s you-kn0w-what day. I will be happy to put work in my rear view for 72 hours. Let the weekend begin…

…when you oversleep by 50 minutes?

Not a lot done.

*poof*

According to the Fink (who needs to work on them as well):

1. Look at people when they talk to you.
2. Always try to greet folks by their name.
3. Sometimes, you must apologize when it’s not your fault. It’s OK. You won’t die, and most times, truth will out.
4. Don’t assume your personal story is always greater, or your experience is always better. Let someone tell his tale, and then comment on his experience.
5. Never start a sentence with “No offense, but…” The listener invariably knows that an offensive comment is next, and then she stops listening in order to concentrate on being offended. Find another way to get your point across.
6. Embrace periods of solitude. They recharge and refresh.
7. Write. Keep a journal, even if it’s not daily. Write fun things, like wishes for your children’s future, where you’d like to be in 20 years, or something funny that happened yesterday. Not only will it serve as self-therapy, it will be a priceless legacy you leave for your children and grandchildren. After you’re gone, they will treasure it and cling to it.
8. To defer is not necessarily a sign of weakness. Don’t ride your opinion pony to the point where you alienate others. Not everyone is dying to hear your take on things.
9. Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you. I think the Golden Rule has been shortened by some to “Do unto others as they do unto you.” They’re missing the point.
10. A derivative of #9: Resist the urge to respond in kind to unkindness. Allow yourself a beat to recover from a hurtful statement, then try to respond in the correct manner. You don’t have to be a pin cushion or whipping boy or punching bag for anyone — but shouting matches rarely solve anything.
11. Be OK with agreeing to disagree, without making it personal. I have seen too many relationships struggle (and sometimes fail altogether) because one or both parties simply would not back down and admit they could have been wrong. Wow.
12. When you apologize, apologize. No “I justs;” no hanging “buts” allowed.

And there’s the dirty dozen. I definitely need to get to work on some of them. And now I need to get to work, period. Yikes!