RNFs at 4 a.m.

My new year’s resolution to try to care a bit less about what people think is being mightily tested. Here is what I observe (in lieu of sleep) this morning:

  1. I am being refined by fire. It’s good for me. By “refined by fire,” I mean watching my character (and that of a colleague) be assassinated in an open forum. And by “it’s good for me,” I mean I did not respond to it. ┬áThose who know me best know that it is not at all like me to take that kind of treatment silently. Win.
  2. There are those who think I have never suffered rejection or disappointment, so I couldn’t possibly identify with what they are going through. Oh my, the stories I could tell…
  3. People who have never spoken more than a few words to me in my life appear to have intimate knowledge of why I make certain decisions. If they were actually correct in their assumptions, it would be beyond cool, ja? It’d be like, I dunno, magic.
  4. It is always easier to assume than to ask. Maybe it’s because we are afraid we won’t like what we hear. (I’ve been guilty of this, too.)
  5. This will all pass, and the sun will come up, and things will again be good. I have 35 years of experience with this stuff telling me that’s the case.
  6. I hate auditions.

What I really want is for someone to get up and make the coffee. Nah, nevermind — I’ll do it. Happy Thursday! I can smell the end of the week…

10 thoughts on “RNFs at 4 a.m.

  1. Country Mouse

    No need to ask how auditions went…..I can see there were some disappointments. I see/know why you hate auditions! This too shall pass and hopefully cooler heads will eventually prevail.
    My “words of wisdom” for those dealing with disappointment….such is life, we don’t always get what we think we deserve, and everything is a “teachable” moment that we can take something away from (good or bad). The most important thing is how we react to our disappointments.
    My words to those being “refined by fire”……keep your chin up…..and a big hug from me to you!
    My words of wisdom to all of us who get bogged down by life…..having lost a 28 year old friend to cancer on Monday….it’s true….life is too short…remember what matters most and live it!

  2. Will

    On one hand, I can sympathize with those people who feel they got gipped for a part. I know I felt that quite a few times back when I still acted. At the same time, I never blamed the directors. I just got angry because I knew I could have done a little better at the audition and maybe I would have gotten the part I wanted. And hey, if I’d gotten the part, maybe we wouldn’t have had to deal with Lazar Wolf deciding to quit four weeks before open so he could warm the benches on JV Baseball. I’m just yanking your chain of course.

    But seriously, yeah, haters gonna hate and if they can’t deal with getting the perfectly serviceable part of Hairdressing Angel #2, then they shouldn’t complain. Just work to be the best freaking Hairdressing Angel #2. Play that part so that the director has to say that Hairdressing Angel #2 is overshadowing Teen Angel just a little and to step back with the part.However, then the director remembers that intensity and next time they’re casting, you find yourself playing Adelaide in Guys and Dolls because they knew what you were capable of. Unluckily, I remember, when you’re in high school, seeing the long term is as likely as your bread rising without any yeast.

    1. Rat Fink Post author

      Well said, Will. And I’d forgotten all about the kid who played Lazar Wolf! LOL

      I feel that the kids will really step up. Had some good conversations with them at school today — even with the ones who were terribly disappointed. Many have come around and are excited about this year and next…

  3. PKPudlin

    Wow, am I behind!

    So sorry to hear of your troubles, girlie. Not sure what it’s all about but hope it’s over soon. Sometimes all you can do is reef the main and batten the hatches until it blows over.

    You can keep silent and not react, but don’t let it eat you from the inside out. Make a loaf of bread and knead all your frustration into it. :)


    1. Rat Fink Post author

      Great idea, friend. In fact, I’m going to make something super sweet this weekend — that oughta fix me right up.

  4. Meg

    Yuck, what a mess. So sorry. But ya know, once rehearsals start everyone seems to figure out why who is casted as who. The show will go on and it was be wonderful!



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