Words you must never use

And not because I say so, but rather, because they make you sound like an…um….well, the name Yosemite Sam hurled at the gol dern dragon.

  1. Foci. (pronounced “foke eye”) There is absolutely no reason to use this word outside a mathematical discipline, unless you just can’t help your annoying, pretentious self. PJ always used it to refer to multiple areas of focus in music ed. research. PJ is the little man who captained the Boston University Titanic on which I sailed several years ago. I won’t elaborate, or I’ll be here all day. Suffice it to say that PJ liked to hear himself use fancy words. PJ is the reason I cringe every time someone says “cogent” or “agency” (in reference to adapting to a concept). PJ ruined those for me, too. PJ killed my inner child. PJ is a bad little PhD. PJ is bad. PJ.
  2. Brah. I suppose it’s a form of “bro” (a word which makes some limited sense), but please don’t use it to call out to your friends unless you want to sound like a Gangsta In Training. (You do the acronym. ;-))
  3. Supposably. I know, I know. “Supposably” is supposedly a word — sort of. I say “sort of” because the adverb form of  the unusual adjective “supposable” doesn’t really exist, but people use it anyway. (Only in America, folks. Only in America.) Just don’t say “supposably” when you really mean to say “supposedly.”
  4. Ironic. Well, you can use it, but please do so carefully. Many people confuse irony with coincidence. Behold: President Lincoln’s assassin shot him in a theater and hid in a warehouse. President Kennedy’s assassin shot him from a warehouse and hid in a theater. That’s not irony. It’s a doozy of a strange coincidence, but still — not ironic. Now what is irony? The Titanic was widely proclaimed “unsinkable,” but it beat feet to the ocean floor on its very first voyage. Whoa. I’ve used the word Titanic twice in one post. Ironic? NO. (Just unimaginative, sadly.)
  5. “I could care less.” If that’s the case, then you care a little. It’s possible that you could care less than you already care, but you’d still care some. You’re caring, however marginally. Now, if you couldn’t care less, it means you’re pretty much done caring; you’re at the bottom of the care barrel. There’s no more caring to go around. Caring less would mean negative caring, which doesn’t exist, so in truth, you simply could not care any less. So you don’t care. OK, I’ll quit now.
  6. 110%. Just…no.

Yes, I’m having a snark attack this morning. Does that make me a bad person? I apologize. I won’t take it out on you. That’s why I have high school students.

14 thoughts on “Words you must never use

  1. Stefan

    Ugh! I HATE when people say “supposably”! Or how about “Libarry?” Or “I seen you the other day”. I once heard someone call the delicious twisted treat a “prentzel.” I could go on and on and on. haha. English…. who needs it?

    Reply
    1. Rat Fink Post author

      Oh lordy. “I seen you” has to be near the top of my hate list. And how about “licen plates?” AAAAARG

      Reply
  2. PKPudlin

    Then there’s the second month of the year, often mispronounced as Feb-you-ary. The month is Feb-roo-ary.

    My personal favorite is ‘prolly’. It’s *probably* also the most annoying.

    PK
    Honorary Diction Police

    Reply
    1. PKPudlin

      PS. You are absolutely correct: PJ was/is a *little* man in many, many ways. I’ll bet he’s only 5′ 6″ with the concomitant disorder commonly referred to as the Napolean Complex. He certainly exhibits all the symptoms.

      Put him from your mind, missy. He ain’t worth the real estate, capisce?

      PK

      Reply
      1. Rat Fink Post author

        PK, as usual, you’re prolly right. (I hate “prolly” as well!)

        Peej would laugh at us mocking him. He’d surely think it was a joke. Usually, I don’t think it’s nice to poke fun at people. I’ll make an exception in his case. Out with the rubbish!

        Reply
    1. Rat Fink Post author

      You are no git! You’re a goit. A goiter. A globule. A Goibelstein. But no git. Hey — are you ignoring me? Git yer calendar out, ya git!

      Reply
  3. Suzanne

    I used to work in a fabric store and we had to fold large pieces of fabric onto rolls. One girl I worked with used to say “it helps if you hold it taunt” HAHAHAH Lordy we used to have fun with that. She never got it tho!!

    Reply
    1. Rat Fink Post author

      And you are my teacha. I wonder…do they use “brah” on Hawaii Five-O? Could that be why everyone’s saying it?

      Reply

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