Monthly Archives: April 2008

Top Ten Albums

This was almost as hard as the Top Ten Movies list. I like so many different kinds of music that it was hard to narrow them down, so I didn’t include the umpteen jazz albums I consider top-of-the-line, and I didn’t O.D. on the Fabs.

So here they are. Any you agree with? I like company in my little rubber room.

Top Ten Albums, According to Me

10. Hell Freezes Over The Eagles (1994)

9. ThrillerMichael Jackson (1982)

8. The Capitol Years (1953-1961) – Frank Sinatra (1990)

7. Never A Dull Moment – Rod Stewart (1971) <– remember that one, Mavis? Wahoo!

6. Abbey RoadThe Beatles (1969)

5. Greatest Hits – James Taylor (1976)

4. Rubber SoulThe Beatles (1965)

3. A Hard Day’s Night – The Beatles (1964)

2.The StrangerBilly Joel (1977)

1. CarelessStephen Bishop (1976)

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Contest #2!

Ok. Big fat king-size Hershey bar – given in person or sent through the mail – to the first reader who emails me at ratfink @ finkweb .org and correctly answers this question:

On the television series Home Improvement, the Taylor family had a neighbor named Wilson. What was Wilson’s first name?

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Winner!

Sam K. correctly answered that Wilson’s first name is Wilson. Wilson Wilson. Heh. Congrats, Samuel – another contest on 15 May!

Fink out. Time fer school.

Top Ten Movies

Hi ho there, neighbor – I have declared the next five days TOP TEN WEEK. You shall get five different lists of ten things that are the best ever, according to the Fink. It’s harder to do than you might guess. Try coming up with ten of your favorite anything. It’s difficult to put them in order (in fact, it’s difficult to choose just ten). I imagine the bottom five could be rearranged or even replaced by some others. Anyway, this is the list as of today.

Top Ten Movies, According to Me

10. It’s a Wonderful Life (1946) – I bawl every single time.

9. The Deer Hunter (1978) – I couldn’t sleep that night. I was sickened, horrified, sad…it was my first film that confronted the realities of what Viet Nam did to young men. I’ve never been the same.

8. Somewhere in Time (1980) – A sweeping romance with one of the shortest, but most beautiful scores I’ve ever heard (the soundtrack features just 27 minutes of music – but what’s there is amazing).

7. Don Juan DeMarco (1995) – One of Johnny’s all-time best.

6. A Hard Day’s Night (1964) – The Beatles as themselves, which is what everyone wanted to see. [Sorry, Help! was a huge stinker. Not funny; not even remotely endearing. They were all mad, sunburned, grumpy and high anyway.]

5. Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975) – I know, it’s silly. But I love it. “Knights of the Round Table” is my favorite scene.

4. Amadeus (1984) – Never get tired of it. A delightful story, and undoubtedly Tom Hulce’s best role (until Amadeus, I had only seen him in Animal House).

3. Immortal Beloved (1994) – “My angel, my all, my very self…only a few words today and that in pencil…” I wasn’t a Gary Oldman fan until this movie.

2. The Godfather trilogy (1972, 1974, 1990) – for me, the most dramatic, disturbing and beautiful trilogy ever made. Props to the Lord of the Rings and original Star Wars – I love those too – but this one makes my list as the greatest threesome of all time.

1. Sweeney Todd – the Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007) – this also makes another list coming up this week, but I couldn’t leave it off this one. Amazing. Disturbing. Mesmerizing.

Stay tuned, mes amis. Tomorrow – Top Ten Albums, According to Me

Waxing nostalgic II

Sometimes, it just feels good to have a good cry, for whatever reason.

I remember back in high school…when a boy would break my heart, I immediately turned to my music, in the privacy of my bedroom. [Can anyone argue the truth of the axiom that music reaches the heart like no spoken word ever could? It’s one of the main reasons behind my choosing music as a career.]

Anyway, I’d turn on my radio or record player, turn up the volume, lie on my bed, and weep – especially if the music was sad.

And friends, no one writes sad love songs quite like Stephen Bishop. Some younger readers may not know the name, but trust me, most of you have either seen him (he was the guitar player sitting on the steps in the movie Animal House) or heard his fabulous songs over the years.

I remember with great clarity one heartbreak that took place in early 1978, when I was a student at Bowling Green State University. Devastated and unable to stop crying long enough to even go to class, I retreated to my dorm room and hid from the world, with Careless as my only company. I’ve uploaded a couple of clips from Careless that I played over and over that day and for several days afterward. I was messed up. Man, how I sobbed, and unfortunately, it wasn’t because of the beauty of Bishop’s flawless high Cs….
Looking for the Right One

Close your eyes and listen to the lyrics on this one. I started it at the bridge:

Same Old Tears on a New Background

The entire album is as close to perfect as I’ve ever heard, before or since, in any genre. His beautiful, simple, sad voice impressed me, but so did his amazing lyrics and expressive guitar playing. He is, in my opinion, one of the top songwriters in pop music.

And this is the ultimate, #1 heartbreak song of all time – Bishop’s “Separate Lives.” Go listen to it. Lawd.

And another lie spins out of control

Considering the proliferation and popularity of today’s game/quiz/reality shows and their enormous cash prizes, it should be no surprise that people will do pretty much anything for money and press. From has-been celebrities degrading themselves in a hot tub with other ex-famous weirdos, to people eating sheep intestines stuffed with live cockroaches, the bloodlust for the 15 minutes of fame – and the payout that comes with it – is irresistible to many.

Although the use of deception to win a game on TV is standard operating procedure today (think Survivor, Big Brother, etc.), it was almost unheard of in the early days of television game shows. Do you smell a story here? Read on…

NBC aired a quiz show, Twenty-One, in September of 1956. Big problem: the premiere was a disaster (contestants looked ridiculous, missing the easiest of questions). Bigger problem: its time slot was pitted against the megahit series I Love Lucy on rival network CBS. Geritol, sponsor of the Twenty-One show, told producers to find a way to get more viewers, or they were pulling out.

Somewhere, at some point, for some reason, the suggestion was made to rig the show by giving contestants answers ahead of time.

Enter Herb Stempel, a teacher from New York who had a great memory. Using the cheat system the network provided, he won lots of money and ratings soared. Classic case of “Regular Guy Wins Big.” But it didn’t last long.

Stempel wasn’t a pretty man, and producers feared he was a turn-off, especially to women who watched the show, and wondered how long the perspiring nerd in the big eyeglasses would hold the attention of the American public. Their answer came in the form of mild-mannered, Charles Van Doren.

His parents were writers, and he was an English professor at Columbia. He was pleasant, well-educated and suave. Stempel was instructed to lose to him, which he did, although he felt betrayed and hoodwinked by the producers (and the irony hangs in the atmosphere…). Van Doren’s star was on the rise; talk about an “American idol.” How big a sensation was he? Big enough to make the cover of TIME.

Now it was Van Doren who was fed the answers. He was good at all the gestures, facial expressions and pregnant pauses. Quite the actor. The public had a new working class hero, and the producers had a hit show. There was just one problem…

They forgot about Herb Stempel.

Hurt and angered by the treatment he received from NBC, Stempel called the authorities and reported the cheating scam. At first, few paid attention to him, probably attributing his ire to sour grapes. But when a rival game show contestant came forward with similar charges, people took notice. Twenty-One, along with a bunch of other quiz shows, was canceled.

Van Doren vehemently denied any wrongdoing. He, along with others involved with Twenty-One, said as much in testimony to the grand jury that convened in New York to investigate the allegations.

Eventually, it all came out and Van Doren could lie no longer. His slightly less-than-sincere testimony included an indictment of the network as well:

I was involved, deeply involved, in a deception. That fact that I, too, was very much deceived cannot keep me from being the principal victim of that deception, because I was its principal symbol.

Van Doren lost his job at Columbia, everyone was disgraced, and the era of the quiz show craze was over.

And here’s the biggest irony: Van Doren lied to a grand jury – which is a felony – about something that was not even illegal.

Nice one, genius.

PS – In 1994, Robert Redford made a movie about the scandal. It was nominated for many awards, including Best Picture at the Oscars. I never did see it, but I think I might rent it. Maybe this weekend.

Waxing nostalgic

Bring back the days when cartoons were actually funny.

Don’t you find it odd that although children’s animated television programs have morphed into the tiresome, politically correct, good-always-wins-with-as-little-violence-as-possible cookie cutter format, our culture is more violent than ever?

I mean, come on. Most of us who were raised on Warner Brothers/Merrie Melodies cartoons turned out all right, didn’t we? Honestly. What’s wrong with Daffy Duck repeatedly smashing into a tree while trying to impress Porky Pig with his Robin Hood-like skills?

I must admit, Daffy is my #1 favorite cartoon character of all time. Definitely one of genius Mel Blanc’s most offensive and obnoxious creations, Daffy would always get what was coming to him — and still come back for more. That was hilarious to me as a kid. Actually, it’s hilarious now, too.

What substitute is there for the spinning of the quarterstaff? [“Actually, it’s a buck-and-a-quarter quarterstaff, but I’m not tellin’ HIM that.”] “Ho! Haha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust!” *boing*…beak folds in half

Now friends….that’s comedy. And Daffy always got the best lines.

Ok, there may be *one* Blanc character more obnoxious than Daffy. That would be my husband’s favorite, the anger management poster boy: Yosemite Sam.

When I say ‘whoa,’ I mean WHOA!

Missed again, ya shovel-nosed mackerel!

Ya better say yer prayers, ya flea-bitten varmint. I’m a-gonna blow ya to smithereenies!

I’ll blast yer head off fer this!

Now I ask you. What’s wrong with getting a little laughter from watching a six-gun-packin’ cowboy midget sociopath get thrown from the parapet of a castle — ten times?

Granted, these cartoons were not originally made for children. Rather, they served as warm-up, short features before the main movie was shown at theaters. It’s easy to tell that they were geared towards adults; many of the characters spoke lines, made gestures, and were even drawn by the animators to simulate modern-day celebrities, politicians, and cultural norms. But hey, we didn’t know that. We just thought they were funny.

Now we have Barney and Dora the Explorer. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But geez, bring back some anvils dropping on Foghorn Leghorn, or Bugs Bunny and Daffy going at it:

“Rabbit season!”

“Duck season!”

“Rabbit season!”

“I say it’s duck season, and I say FIRE!”

:0)

Ho ho. Very funny. Ha ha. It is to laugh.