And because the Grammar Hammer can only stay in the drawer for so long:
Insulted Idioms and Lambasted Labels (poor things)
- It takes two to tangle. No, it takes two to tango.
- Card shark/pool shark. Actually, if you do something like play cards or pool really well, you’re a sharp. A card sharp. I know, sounds funny. And it’s unlike a loan shark; that’s a fish of a different color altogether.
- Extract revenge. Getting someone back for wronging you is exacting revenge. Extracting revenge would be pulling vengeance out of another person, thus putting it on oneself. Don’t nobody want that.
- Please RSVP. This is really picky, I know, but it doesn’t make it any less redundant. “RSVP” stands for the French phrase, répondez s’il vous plaît, which means “Please answer.” So, a proper response to “Please RSVP” would be, “All right already; ya doesn’t hasta beg.”
- Laundrymat. Seems to make more sense, but actually, it’s laundromat, used by Westinghouse years ago to describe their automatic laundry machines.
- Orangutang. Definitely more fun to say it that way, but there’s no ‘G’ on the end. OranguTAN.
- Get the “i” out. It’s pastoral, mayoral, electoral. Same thing with the “u” sound. Don’t say nup-tu-al; say nuptial. No need to put an extra syllable in there, as Americans are often wont to do.
- Upmost. Nope. You have the utmost respect for your elders.
- We need your imput. No you don’t. You need my input.
- Finally, for the hundredth time: There is only ONE ‘R’ in SHERBET. SherBET. BET. I snickered when I read this quote from Primer magazine: “This is one of those words that ultimately had to abandon its crusade for righteousness and now has been corrupted to the point where dictionaries may list the incorrect pronunciation as acceptable because of just how rampant the carelessness grew to be. But there’s only one ‘R’ in ‘sherbet,’ America. No matter how awesome the rainbow flavor is, there’s still only one ‘R’.”
Hey, the chocolate cake is done. Time to put together an experiment in decadence before taking off for rehearsal. Happy weekend!