Category Archives: Entertainment

Holy hair extensions, Batman

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Does anyone else think these look bad? Fake? Unattractive? (Click all the photos for larger views.)

Britney Spears is the worst offender. I mean, look at the short hair on top and the obviously tied-in junk. It looks wound so tight that her scalp could flipping dislodge at any second. It’s grotesque. And this is supposed to be “hot” right now? I think it just looks unnatural, and like the lady hasn’t washed her hair in weeks.
Same thing with Penelope Cruz. Ugh. Wash ’em, girl. They nasty.

Then there are the gals who apparently think it’s attractive to have a huge avalanche of hair appear to grow out from underneath their ears. I swear I don’t see the point of it. [Have you ever seen this from the back? It looks like a pair of ragged drapes, pulled back to expose a hairy neck.]

Then it’s the stringy look. Makes me crazy. I guess some people like it, but I think it shouts, “Hey, I’m wearing half a wig that I never brush.”

Disclaimer: Lord knows — and so do all my friends/family — that I have my hair issues. But I’m trusting them to tell me if I’ve gone too far, especially in the event I’d actually start buying more hair. I can hardly control what I already have.

Fink out.

Cinéma diabolique

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Yeah, I’m on about Sweeney Todd again. Who knew? Actually, I watched a DVD extra from the film (thanks, Sam), and it got me thinking about a genre of theater that only lasted about 50 years, but made a big impression — obviously — on many filmmakers of our generation.While making Sweeney, director Tim Burton envisioned a movie reminiscent of the Grand Guignol tradition of live theater. So, what was this deliciously evil brand of entertainment, anyway?

Grand Guignol (let’s first get the French right: it’s pronounced “grawn geen-yol”) was the name given to a type of play performed in Paris, beginning around the turn of the 20th century. Its creator, a controversial playwright named Menetier, bought an old chapel and converted it into a theater where he could freely show his works, which often depicted the dregs of society doing scandalous things. He eventually sold the theater to another guy, who decided to convert the Theatre du Grand Guignol into a horror palace.

The plays got increasingly macabre and violent. More and more liberties were taken to see just how realistic a murder scene could become. Grand Guignol was in its heyday, and the theater often attracted the high society of Paris, as well as its share of tourists — all of them looking for the ultimate gross-out. They got it. The actual plot of the story didn’t seem to matter, as long as it was gruesome, bloody and realistic.

It had the desired effect, too. In his book, The Grand Guignol: Theatre of Fear and Terror, Mel Gordon says:

At one performance, six people passed out when an actress, whose eyeball was just gouged out, re-entered the stage, revealing a gooey, blood-encrusted hole in her skull. Backstage, the actors themselves calculated their success according to the evening’s faintings. During one play that ended with a realistic blood transfusion, a record was set: fifteen playgoers had lost consciousness. Between sketches, the cobble-stoned alley outside the theatre was frequented by hyperventilating couples and vomiting individuals.

Awesome.

The GG eventually died out in the 1960s, but it’s enjoying a renaissance out in San Francisco right now.

Indeed, the effect of Grand Guignol on mainstream film was felt long before Burton’s Sweeney Todd – many times throughout the 50s and 60s, most notably.

But hey, remember the movie, Interview With the Vampire ? It’s based on one of my all-time favorite series of novels (The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice). Here’s the original trailer for the 1994 film, starring Tom Cruise. Brad Pitt was in it too, and it also featured a very young Kirsten Dunst. I loved it. Anyway, in that movie, there is a scene in which the vampires of Paris put on a play in the Théâtre des Vampires — a takeoff on the Grand Guignol Theatre.

The only difference, of course, was that in the play they performed, the audience had the unfortunate experience of slowly realizing that the human sacrifice depicted onstage was, in fact, quite real…

So rent Interview this weekend and watch it with your hunny. I might blow the dust off my VHS copy of it and share a cinematic memory of days gone by, when Tom Cruise was actually *not* a wackjob.

Vive la Grand Guignol!

Le Rongeur de Finque

More dumb famous people

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Now friends, this is why I scratch my graying head. Amy Winehouse, talented singer and repeat arrestee, was recently voted by UK teenagers as their “ultimate heroine.” That’s ultimate heroine, as in someone we totally admire and want to emulate. It’s not the bizarre face or the tats or the rat’s nest bouffant wig that bug me; I don’t care about any of that. Rather, it’s the tremendous hash she’s made of her life. This is hero material? Slurring your way through a horrible set at a club, not being able to remember the words or stand up straight? Yeah, that’s great stuff. I’m all over that. Sheesh.

Note to UK kids: aim higher.

Much has been written about why these stars — who seemingly have everything going for them — find their way into so much trouble. The reasons range from dealing with a lot of money all at once, to living the life they only dreamed about while growing up in the projects of South Los Angeles. Regardless, many of them suffer from the dreaded recidivism; they just keep getting in hot water, over and over.

How many of us have said something akin to, “Man, if I had that kind of fame and money, I wouldn’t screw it up by beating somebody up or hiring hookers or committing armed robbery.” Makes me wonder if people like Gary Dourdan (star of CSI) ever said that. He has a hit TV show, he’s handsome (although not in this particular photo, taken the night of his arrest), young, and rich. Why on earth would he get caught with not only heroin, but cocaine and ecstasy too? Are we dumm?? Or is it just because celebrities’ lives and troubles are plastered all over the media, making it more noticeable?

I can understand the Kurt Cobain mentality. I mean, at least the guy stood for something. Like it or not, he was a pioneer. He was the archetypical disillusioned, tortured, talented, angry young rocker, and lots of kids identified with that. That he met an untimely and violent end by his own hand only jacked up his mythical status. I’m not talking about that stuff. I’m talking about idiotic actions that make you look not only stupid, but ungrateful and immature. OJ Simpson thought some guy stole some of his memorabilia, so he broke into the man’s hotel room and threatened him. That was dumb enough. The fact that OJ and his buddies had loaded weapons? Uber dumb. Dumb’s daddy. The mother of all things dumb. Simpson is just another face in a long line of arrogant celebrities who think the laws don’t apply to them. I’d say the boy has gone to the well one too many times…we’ll find out in September, I guess.

Maybe it’s as simple as this: these people just have too much time on their hands, and too much money to throw around.

Oh, to be so unfortunate…

Fink out.

Top Ten TV Shows

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I don’t watch much television nowadays. With school, shows, family stuff and my Boston U. classes, it’s too crazy. I’m lucky if I get to look at a movie once in awhile or sit down on a weekend to watch the Indians lose.

So, most of these shows–actually, all but one– are no longer with us, which is a shame for sure. I’ve linked all the titles so you can read more about them if you like.

Top Ten TV Shows, According to Me

10. Quantum Leap. Dr. Sam Beckett (Scott Bakula) time-travels from place to place in history, trying to set right the things that go wrong. However, as he is trapped in an endless journey, he always hopes that the next “leap” he makes is the leap home.

9. Dark Shadows. I liked both the original series from the sixties as well as the revival show in the early nineties. I remember being in 3rd grade, and my sister and I would make sure to be inside at 3:30 every day to watch Barnabas Collins (which I thought was cool because Collins was my name, too) bite people and scare us to death.

8. F Troop. Absolute silliness, but I loved it as a kid. I wanted to be funny like Larry Storch.

7. Hogan’s Heroes. My dad loved this series, too. The gruesome murder of Bob Crane, who played Colonel Hogan, is one of Hollywood’s unsolved mysteries. [He was bludgeoned to death inside an apartment in Arizona in 1978. Ugh.]

6. St. Elsewhere. Great doctor “dramedy” about the craziness inside a fictitious Boston hospital. It had a serious side too, but hey, when Howie Mandel is on staff (he played Dr. Wayne Fiscus), what can you expect? I never missed an episode, although I — along with a nation of other shocked viewers — stared in disbelief at the series finale ending. Whoa.

5. Dallas. The unquestionable drama series king of the 80s. [I always knew Kristin did it.]

4. Knots Landing. A Dallas spin-off that typified the 1980s. Full of excess and selfish pleasure, throwing caution (and silly things like honesty, obeying the law, and fidelity) to the wind. It was a guilty indulgence for housewives, and I lapped it up.

3. Heroes. Premiere of Season Three is 15 September. Can’t wait.

2. Rod Serling’s Night Gallery. I absolutely refused to watch this show alone, or in the dark. The theme song, played behind a montage of truly creepy, violent-looking paintings, was enough to get the freakout started. There were very few special effects outside of make-up; all the torture happened in your own mind. It was simultaneously hideous and thrilling. I rarely missed an episode.

1. The 4400. I was truly depressed when this show was canceled, because it was successful and had good stories (ok, and Joel Gretsch is dreamy). A large effort to get the show back on the air is underway, but who knows….stupid USA Network anyhow.

Top Ten Week was fun. I think I’ll do it again sometime.

Pax,

RF

Top Ten Musicals

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The hard part about this list is not narrowing down the number of my fave musicals, but putting them in order. I don’t have a lot of “favorite” Broadway shows. It’s actually a very small collection.

Top Ten Broadway Musicals, According to Me

10. The Sound of Music – Rodgers & Hammerstein. I was Maria in my high school production. That’s why this gets the #10 spot. (Ok, that, and Gabe likes it, and I want to humor him.)

9. Godspell – Stephen Schwartz. For a sixties musical with then-contemporary songs, it never sounds dated. Love it.

8. Forever Plaid – A huge favorite ever since I saw my nephew, Jason, play Sparky in a professional production in North Carolina back in 2002. Awesome old standards, sung in tight 4-part harmony. And don’t forget hilarious.

7. Les Misérables – Schoenberg & Boublil. Beautifully written and staged, it had a long run on Broadway. Saw it three times. I haven’t seen the movie version, though.

6. West Side Story – Leonard Bernstein & Stephen Sondheim. Based loosely on Romeo and Juliet, this was the first musical I ever saw that did not have a happy ending. The music is gorgeous, and not for weak singers.

5. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers – Gene DePaul, Johnny Mercer & Al Kasha. The songs are wonderful and the movie is a delight; two years ago, I music-directed the stage version. Most fun I ever had directing a show.

4. Funny Girl – Jule Styne, Bob Merrill. Ok, so I had the lead in this one in high school, too. Most fun I ever had acting in a show.

3. Singin’ in the Rain – Herb Brown & Arthur Freed. Best movie musical, period. Ever.

2. Phantom of the Opera – Andrew Lloyd Webber. Yeah, I know. All the theater snobs are saying, “Ew…how 1986.” Go ahead. And choke on your sashimi while you’re at it. But for me to see a show on Broadway, in Toronto (with Colm Wilkinson as the phantom) and Cleveland for a total of eight times and still bawl all the way through the second act….that’s some powerful music. I will always love it.

1. Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street – Stephen Sondheim. I never liked the Broadway stage version soundtracks. Too much wobbly-opera-singer vibrato. The songs sounded way too melodramatic for my taste. But the 2007 movie….well, you know all about that.