Know all men by these presents…

…that I intend to do whatever is necessary to rid America of the reprehensible, appalling, disgusting, vile behavior that has gripped the waning consciousness of greedy, malicious, classless people who have managed to once again turn the US into a worldwide laughing stock (as if we needed any help in that category).

Of course, I’m talking about Black Friday. Behold:

And it’s getting worse every year.

Had enough of pigs at the trough yet?

And as I was just discussing on Facebook — how many people will have to die before the government realizes that people can’t be trusted to control their own behavior, so it behooves the feds to step in and control it for them? RtB fiend Steve reminded me of the “festival seating” disaster in Cincinnati in 1979. It resulted in a 24-year ban on open seating for concerts in that city. They lifted the ban in favor of increased security and crowd-control measures. But they did something after someone died.

Not a single detail about Black Friday changed after this incident in 2008 (in fact, the only change was that stores opened for the filthy behavior on Thanksgiving Day, instead of the day after). Why not? I’ll let you guess.

Ladies and gentlemen, Decency has left the building.

4 thoughts on “Know all men by these presents…

  1. David

    Simply sickening; there are no witty ways to paint the phenomenon that surrounds the events of Black Friday / now Thursday where seemingly intelligent human beings act like rabid animals so they can get a flat screen TV for $150.

    There are lots of things that stores could do to limit the degree of creating the mob behavior, but they won’t. Greed is a core value of Western capitalism, the driving force! Not sure anything will change Ms Fink; most will forget about this years atrocities soon and they will be repeated next year.

    I have always been a “glass is half full” sort of guy, I am not in regards to this subject…saddens me!

  2. Mavis

    Black Friday. The name fits. Why not, *Shop ’til ya drop….dead, Friday* How about, *I’m gonna get that bargain if it kills me, Friday*. This country kills rulers in other countries because they have no morals. We have protesters walking the streets, yelling about one cause or another, but nothing is done about the shameful acts of “bargain hunting”. I don’t get it.

  3. Rae

    I can’t even bring myself to watch those or any videos having to do with Black Friday. I had a random conversation before the concert last night with the concertmaster and he said that he goes to for his “news” in the mornings, too, and that he couldn’t bring himself to click on any videos either. It’s just — it doesn’t make much sense these days. Your idea of catching Black Friday deals online without risking your LIFE seems like the smartest idea going, and yet, people don’t take advantage of the technology we have. They treat Black Friday as some kind of “tradition”, like a thrill ride for bargain junkies. Much like another article on about the South African 5-star hotel that built a “Shanty Town” so wealthy travelers could “slum” it… for fun. Same sort of bad news. :P

    Just another excuse to cause hate. Mavis has a point here — “shameful acts of ‘bargain hunting’..”. Spot on, there.

  4. Rat Fink Post author

    Fiends, I hear ya. “I’m gonna get that bargain if it kills me…or someone else.” Ha

    While my temper has cooled off a bit since I wrote this post, I’m still mad that people sink to such low levels for “stuff.” And as far as I know, it’s only in America, where we certainly don’t need another demonstration of capitalistic greed to pile on top of our already-terrible reputation in the eyes of other countries.

    Perhaps what we need to do is spread the word that Black Friday prices are just reductions in jacked-up October and November prices, and that the real bargains can be had all the way up to Christmas Eve.


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