Hello, fiends. It’s been too long. Didn’t I say I wasn’t going to disappear for extended periods of time anymore? I believe I did. And here I am, after a long absence. Still, you’ve been on my mind — as have many things.
The Fink is armed and ready for battle. (Is that not a great drawing of Yours Truly? Mad respect to Andy Nortnik for always getting Rat Girl right.)
I’m wrasslin’ with several dragons lately; some I’ve told you about already, and some I haven’t. Some are tactile and real, and others are of the emotional and cerebral variety. Many are way beyond my control, while others lie perfectly within my grasp. Some are just dumb. This day, I fight:
1. The insanity surrounding Common Core, and now, the reality of test refusal coming to my district (though I won’t fight that).
2. Trying to get back to being good to this old creaky bod. I just said to someone the other day: “I have a beautiful treadmill in the basement. There is absolutely no weather-related excuse why I can’t work out.” And yet…So, today, I fight that dragon. And I will win it for today, for five minutes from now, when I stop writing. Tomorrow? Tomorrow will have to look after itself for the time being.
And to a (much) lesser extent:
3. Boring, musically vapid Super Bowl halftime shows. You know, I think the shark has been jumped here (no pun intended) with regard to every year’s SB halftime being bigger, better, badder and nuttier. Last night’s version seemed more in line with an Olympics opening ceremony than with a halftime show, complete with flying people, great huge mechanical animals, and silly cartoonish characters dancing about. Add to that the rather-cool-but-totally-bizarre addition of Lenny Kravitz and Missy Elliott, and well…yeah. And I won’t even touch the renditions of God Bless America (John Legend) and the Star Spangled Banner (Idina Menzel).
4. The utterly infuriating trend of non-funny spokeswomen trying to be funny in commercials. What…is there research out there that supports goading the public into buying a product just so companies will stop advertising it? Does unfunny comedy traditionally sell hamburgers, insurance and phone contracts? Maybe it does, I dunno. But every time I see these commercials, I want to drown something.
And if I don’t get up from this box and get on to the next thing on the list, I’ll be here all day. Off to tread on my mill; moving in silent desperation, keepin’ an eye on the Holy Land…