DISCLAIMER: I know there are exceptions to every rule. Please preface each of my reasons with a silent, mental “In many cases in the Fink’s experience…” In other words, I do not hate your cat. It ain’t personal. [And Chevy, the Famous American Cat, always gets a pass. I’ve met Cocoa from a distance, and she passes muster, too.] I know that dogs have their “issues” as well, so, yeah.

Here, in as honest and fair a manner as I can convey, are the reasons I do not like cats.

1.  They like to dig their claws into furniture, carpets, drapes, walls, and you. I know it’s supposed to be an important part of a cat’s happy life (scratching on surfaces to groom its claws, and climbing up things to feed its arboreal nature), but it doesn’t make me happy. If I want to be a pin cushion, I’ll get the needles out of my sewing kit and have at it. Ever try to pull a cat off your shoulder when it has its talons planted a quarter inch deep into your flesh? Hey, that’s fun! I’ll have one of those! Even if the cat is declawed, that fth, fth, fth motion it makes with its feet (phantom clawing) is a bit creepish to me.
2. If I read or hear one more time that “my cat allows me to live in his house, tee hee!” I am going to bash heads. Widely known in the Fink house: ain’t nobody Mama’s boss. I adore Rousseau and spoil him rotten with love, but he will by crackie mind me, and come when he’s called. And if I’m brushing his hair or gently combing out a mat or bathing him or anything else he doesn’t particularly enjoy, he will sit still and endure it without hissing, scratching, biting or running away.
3. The indifferent prissiness is not cute. If I wanted a pet that couldn’t care less about me, I’d get a…well…a cat.
4. Pets need to potty outside. Ew. And don’t even get me STARTED on the fact that there is a leash law in my city to prevent dogs from running loose, and a scooper law forbidding them to poop in people’s yards, but the law does not apply to cats. They’re flippin’ Elsa, born free, and they can roam wherever they like. Fine. Then I should be able to get a rifle and shoot them at will when they use my yard like a new container of Fresh Step, or when they attempt to claw the cover off my grandsons’ sandbox. Where are the fines for cat owners? (I know this isn’t a “cat” issue, but a human one. Still.)
5. I just prefer a dog’s nature. Rousseau is a creature of unconditional love. He wants nothing more than to please us, and that makes us love him all the more. He doesn’t need “alone time,” and he’s never unpredictable or aloof or snotty. He always wants to be petted and fussed over. I can reach down to pet him a hundred thousand times, and never once end up scratched or bleeding.

…which is why I will never own a cat, although I certainly do not begrudge my family and friends from owning one. Vive la difference!

I was reading the NYT during my quiet time this morning (which is still going on, by the way, since the Js wore themselves — and me — out last night), and came across something that made me giggle. You ever have those moments? In this entertaining op-ed, there were several.

The writer’s father is Russian. She remembers drinking only room-temperature beverages as a child, so she called up Dad in Ukraine to ask him why he hated ice. His response:

‘Ice? I don’t hate ice,’ he began. ‘It’s just that when these Americans hand you a can from the freezer, and it is already so cold that just touching it practically turns your hand into a claw, I don’t really see the need to add ice.'”

You know, he’s got a point there.

It got me to thinking, too…what other uniquely American traits drive people nuts, and what about other cultures makes us crazy? And please — I’m not talking about the US’s gross disregard for our planet or a failed political system or infamous American capitalism and greed. Save those more serious opinions for Usenet, or Facebook, or whatever. Please and thank you.

Rather, I refer to idiosyncrasies that make us decidedly different from our non-North American counterparts. Like the “we put ice in everything, even if it’s already freezing cold” thing. Although I have not been to a non-European country outside the US, I have noticed (or have been informed of) several differences that made me smile, cringe, or scratch my head:

1. Europeans seem far less worried about “personal space.” Ride a city bus in Rome and you’ll see what I mean.
2. Americans seem much more preoccupied with time management, and not having enough time. In Europe, no one is in a hurry.
3. Teenage years are not “celebrated” with dances, proms and sports as much in Europe as they are here. I think someone from France would ask, “What’s a pep rally??”
4. When a teacher walks into an American student center lounge, no one notices. When it happens in Korea, students stop what they’re doing, put out their cigarettes, and stand up to greet her.
5. Even if the choices are not popular, America has a fascination with all things European/Asian, and the reverse is true as well. I guess the grass is greener and all that…

I know many who read RtB are well traveled. What have you noticed?

And in Dutch: Waarom?

Once again, the local school bond issue failed. Someone on Facebook blamed it on “old people” ruining the town, but that’s not the point. (Census says otherwise, anyway.) ¿Por qué? Pourquoi? Why do people reject improvements for our schools? I break it down as follows:

1. People are mad about lack of school board fiscal stewardship (real or imagined)
2. People are inherently selfish, and they aren’t willing to give up a nickel for something that doesn’t affect them a) in a positive manner, b) personally, and c) right dang now.
3. People fear that they won’t be able to make it with any more taxes piled on (this especially applies to homeowners)
4. People are ignorant of what the passage of the issue will really provide, and how the taxes will be levied
5. People are ignorant, period

I mean, honestly. If the levy was going to provide a new swimming pool/workout complex for faculty….well, I’d still vote for it. Seriously, though: our local middle school was built in 1910. Several of our elementary schools are also over 100 years old. Talk about a money pit. The high school (1964) isn’t much better. The Ohio School Facilities Commission was willing to kick in 39% of the cost of renovating and building new schools. It would have cost me about $150 a year. That’s a deal I could live with.

Apparently, not enough voters agreed with me.

It’s fine to hate government or local leadership and its spendthrift ways. But some people don’t seem to get the fact that new schools are not built on a whim, or because the teachers and kids by-God want air conditioning. These undertakings are far more serious. In other words, this isn’t our daddy’s educational environment, or our granddaddy’s. What was “good enough for me when I was in school” doesn’t play anymore. But that statement and $3 will buy you a cappu at Bux, right?

Then there’s the other huge “pourquoi?” — Cisco Systems laid off our dear BoomR. In this economy, he lost his job. We’re all pulling for you, Boom Boom. Your talent supersedes this quandary; someone will notice that, and soon. Much love to you.

Things are happening on the job front with other RtB family members as well. Hugs all around.

Speaking of jobs…one of my principals wants me to call him. Off I go.

FO

So, whadda we got this morning?

Remember Kwame Kilpatrick, former mayor of Detroit? I’ve referenced him in my posts twice (here and here). Why him more than any other politician? I dunno. Maybe because what he did (texting his mistress using government-supplied — and therefore totally trackable — devices); I have no idea.

Anyhow, he got out today, after serving time for violation of probation. Do some people never learn? That’s what I wonder. I mean, violation of probation has to be the dumbest infraction of all; the judicial equivalent to biting the hand that feeds you, or slapping a generous host in the face. All you have to do is keep your hands clean (and in Kwame’s case, just be honest about how many assets you have squirreled away), and all will be fine. Feh.

But all’s well that ends well. Or at least it’s ended.  He will now go back to being the pride of Grand Prairie (TX). Best wishes to him. And stay outta trouble, slice.

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If Jared Followill of Kings of Leon is truly suffering from “vocal issues,” it’s going to take a lot longer than a month to recover. Jumping back into an international tour schedule after only four weeks of vocal rest is, at the very least, ill-advised. [Ask me how I know this.] But, as the brief article states, it’s more than an issue of the singer not hydrating himself properly. Surprise!

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Well, darn. I would love to know how he pulled it off.

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I was happy to see Gabrielle Giffords’s return to Congress. Yay for her!

Well, off to my Tuesday. I didn’t do half of what I wanted to accomplish yesterday, but choir music for fall is ordered, so that’s out of the way. Today will be a day of productivity, I hope. Onward!

FO

Photo: Newsone.com